October 30,2013
A New Addition...

This week I adopted a dog from my local SPCA. I have always had pets, and there have been few spaces in my life when I have lived without a pet. However, my dog, Tequila, passed away in July, and I have felt sad and empty ever since. I didn't feel ready or that I could take on a new pet after I lost Tequila because I was so devastated at the loss of that special relationship that I had with him.

Tequila was a unique and special character with a big personality and lots of energy. He loved and protected me and he can never be replaced.

But, I have lots of love to give and I miss having an animal companion. I was reading the local paper, when I saw the SPCA's "Pet of the Week." I knew immediately that he was the right dog for me, so I made arrangements to go to the SPCA to meet him. Sure enough, when he came bounding out with a doggy smile on his face, I knew that he was right. So, this week, I adopted Paco, a two year old terrier cross with the sweetest face and a disposition to match. Immediately, joy returned to my life.

While I know that not everyone's lifestyle supports having a pet, I do recommend it for those who can have one. In my life, I have had many cats … we always had one or more in our family when I was growing up … and, as an adult, I have had six: McDuff, Scout, Tiger, Katie, Dave and Pepper. I have had three dogs: Tasha, Tequila and now, Paco. All of these pets lived happy healthy loving lives and all of them gave more to me than I to them.

© Carla Weaver 2013.


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October 29,2013
The Internet Has No Heart

I do not believe that we are meant to live isolated from others. Yet, today, many people are single, divorced or widowed; many work from home. Technology facilitates fast easy communication without ever actually talking to, seeing, or touching another human, and so instead of reinforcing our connectedness, we become more separated.

Businesses and organizations direct us to their websites as their first points of contact, and they have come to believe that they are building stronger relationships with their contacts because the web can track consumer behavior and blast out pertinent marketing information. While all of that is efficient and good and has a purpose, it is a fallacy that it is truly strengthening any relationships. You see, the one thing that people fail to recognize is that the Internet has no heart. It is merely a tool that we can use to serve our purposes but it is not a substitute for true human relationships.

I have belonged to a club for several years, and I would say that its primary purpose ... at least for me ... was to develop social relationships and friendships with like-minded people. However, the governing body of the organization has used the website as a barrier between the organization and its membership rather than as a tool in service of its members. There is a subtle difference between using it as a tool versus as a barrier. I note that many businesses also make their websites a barrier. How many times have you wanted to talk to a human being at a company and checked the website to get a phone number? Many times, I have searched every nook and cranny on a website for their phone number only to come up empty handed and frustrated. If you are the owner of a website, ask yourself if your site has any heart? While it cannot truly have heart, you can try to make it a tool to facilitate communication rather than a barrier between you and your clientele.

And, if you're isolated – living alone, working alone from home, not able to get out – I encourage you to find some ways to reinforce your connectedness to the Universe and to other people by picking up the phone, going for a walk, or getting out to spend time in human contact EVERY DAY. This separation and isolation that we are moving toward will eventually be the downfall of our civilization because the Internet has no heart.

© Carla Weaver 2013


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October 28,2013
Love is all there is ....

"Love is supreme … Love must govern … We create our own surroundings by the thoughts we think. We are sent here to live life fully, to live it abundantly, to find joy in our own creations, to experience both failure and success, to use free will to expand and magnify our lives (Eadie, 1994, p. xv)."

These are the words of Betty Eadie, author of Embraced by the Light. Edie experienced two near-death experiences in her life and has written about what her experiences and meeting with God revealed to her.

It is comforting to read that all there really is is love. The Beatles sang about that. "Love is all there is." Edie writes that we are to "find joy in our own creations." In my extensive research on creativity, I have found that creativity comes from love. To create something, we really love it into existence. We paint the flower because we love it enough to spend the time and energy painting it.

We write the story because we love the idea and process enough to make it be. Sometimes, our skills and talents fall short of creating our vision, and so we may be disappointed in the outcomes, but by continuing to hone our skills, we "expand and magnify our lives," our art, our talents.

"Love is all there is…"

Reference:

Edie, Betty. (1994). Embraced by the Light, Bantam Books.

© Carla Weaver 2013


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October 22,2013
Closed Hearts

Yesterday, I met a man with two cute little dogs. I stopped to talk to him about his dogs. It is amazing how dogs can bridge the gap between strangers and facilitate conversations that might otherwise not occur. It is as if when you see someone with a happy dog, you already know that the person has a loving heart. I told the man that my dog passed away, and he told me that twenty years ago, he had a dog that passed away. He was so sad about the loss of his dog that he could not bring himself to adopt another. More recently, he adopted the two little dogs that I saw with him, and he realized that his heart had been closed for twenty years. He saw how much joy he had missed by not having a dog in his life.

© Carla Weaver 2013


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October 14,2013
Practicing Gratitude

As I practice gratitude this weekend, I am grateful for family and friends. My Mom will turn 90 this year, and I am grateful for the inspiration and strength that she has shown me throughout my life. I am grateful to my Dad for his quiet spirit and the good life that he provided to us when he was living, and I am grateful that he is still in my heart. I am grateful for my brother and his love and friendship. I am grateful for my step dad and his family and the happiness that this relationship has brought to my Mom. I am grateful for friends, good health and a good life.

I recall hearing a Unity Church minister speak of practicing gratitude "at a causative level," and I try to practice it in both a heartfelt way and a way to continue to bring more of what I focus on into my life.

I try to remind myself that worrying or focusing on the negative or criticizing are the opposites of gratitude and must be avoided.

I have recently passed through a time of grief and sadness and some work and relationship challenges. It seemed that I was living Murphy's Law. And yet, I recognize now that I was completely focused on those challenges in my life which may have compounded them.

Today, I am grateful for what is and looking forward to more of the positive.

© Carla Weaver 2013


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October 14,2013
Giving Thanks

All of us face challenges in our lives, some greater than others. It can be difficult to look beyond the challenges to be grateful for what's going well. But it's Thanksgiving weekend, and a time to focus on gratitude. For what are you grateful?

A few days ago, I ran into a friend who has some health issues. I asked her if she was ok. She said, "I am Ok. It is my body that Is not so well." I was impressed by her attitude and by her knowing that her spirit is ok. And that is the truth. No matter what is going on in our lives, our spirits are ok. Our spirits are who we truly are, and they are the essence of love. How can that not be ok?

When we focus on something, we bring more of it into our lives. And, so, this Thanksgiving weekend, I encourage you to think about gratitude. Focus on the good things in your life and cause more of it to occur in your life.

© Carla Weaver 2013


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October 11,2013
Show a Little Kindness

This morning, I am reminded about Wayne Dyer's question: "Is it better to be right or to be kind?" It seems so often that egos get in the way of kindness, especially in the workplace. While it may be part of our work responsibilities to sell an idea or make a decision based on what we think is right, it is also important to do it with kindness and to respect others' points of view. Sure, we may all be under time pressures to balance heavy workloads and wear many hats in a day, but we can still accomplish that by practicing kindness. There is much less face-to-face communication as we accomplish more and more with technology, and we forget that there is a human being with feelings behind every faceless name with whom we communicate. Remember to be kind.

I try to choose work associations that support kindness and compassion. While I understand that goals or opinions or decisions may not all be consistent with my views, I respect others' opinions and hope that they will respect mine. What I do not respect is an environment or relationship that doesn't support or respect others' views and allows or fosters disrespectful behavior, bullying or unkindness. Each of us can do our part. If I am kind to you, you will be kind to the next person, and so on, and so on, and so on.

I found this lovely little poem at http://www.scrapbook.com/poems/doc/12159/251.html

"My Daily Creed"

Let me be a little kinder,
Let me be a little blinder
To the faults of those about me;
Let me praise a little more.
Let me be, when I am weary,
Just a little bit more cheery;
Let me serve a little better
those that I am striving for.

Let me be a little braver
When temptation bids me waver;
Let me strive a little harder to be all
that I should be.
Let me be a little meeker
With the brother that is weaker,
Let me think more of my neighbour
And a little less of me.

Author: Unknown

© Carla Weaver 2013


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